Vexation
Tia Dalma: You know of Davy Jones, yes? A man of the sea. . .until he ran afoul of that which vex all men.
Will: What vexes all men?Tia Dalma: What indeed?
Gibbs: The sea?
Bald Pirate: Sums?
Wood-eyed Pirate: The dichotomy of good and evil?
Jack: A woman.
The End (and amen).
Of course there is more to the story. According to the movie a woman broke his heart, so Davy Jones cut it out and stuck it in a box.
There comes a point in every human life, or so I imagine, when that doesn't sound like such a bad idea; the idea of being able to separate oneself from the vulnerability of emotion (not so much the cutting out of the heart)...but I'm just being dramatic right now.
I've been spending the last couple weeks wallowing in despair, and I'm sorry that you've encountered it, even in a highly diluted form on my blog. I think I'll be somewhat back to normal in a day or two. Thanks for everybody who's been willing to listen to me blather on about what has been vexing me (same as what vexes all men).
3 comments:
Shoot. Sorry to hear about it. It's ok to wallow in despair for a little while (sometimes the greatest writing comes out of it, so milk that for all it's worth if you've the heart)--but don't stay down long, k?
Thanks Sarah. I honestly haven't had the heart to produce great works of writing from this experience. I've thought about some ideas for some poems and/or songs, but I don't know if I can do my emotions justice here. I may have the soul of a poet (and the freaking internal emotions), but I don't have the words.
Also, I'm not too bad off. At least it's over now. I got the worst of it a couple weeks ago when I started to get the NOTHING (as you talked about in your blog). That was much more painful to deal with.
The worst part now is all the second guessing that I am doing. What if I had done this differently? Wasn't she just sending me super positive signs a month ago? How could I have been so bloody stupid at such-and-such-and-such points? How could I misread this all so badly? Etc. . .
Sometimes being a "thinker" just sucks. We don't communicate well at the necessary times, and we tend not to act on instinct when it comes to emotional events.
Wow, this turned out longer than I expected. In short, I think I bungled this big time. But I'll eventually be OK.
Ug, the NOTHING sucks. I've definitely gone through the second-guessing stage too. I wonder how many relationships are spoiled by pure clumsiness!
Glad you're feeling more hopeful, though. I like the XP analogy. :) I think it works.
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