Conversations on Sex

For the last several summers I've had the privilege of working with a pretty crusty group of guys, and when we are out alone in the wilderness their conversations often turn towards the things of the "natural man" (yes I am speaking about sex). I don't mind this so much because I know that their values are much different than mine. But when I encounter the same type of conversation on campus at BYU, I am much more disturbed.

This happened to me almost two weeks ago. A group of my friends and I were sitting in the hall studying between classes when the conversation began to take a turn in this direction. It was mainly directed by one young man who took it upon himself to "educate" those sitting in the hall on the nuances of human reproduction. He was very proud of his expansive knowledge, and he acted as if he was doing us all a favor (though he said nothing that I hadn't already heard before). Several of the people he was speaking to were 19-year-old freshman girls, and this is what bothered me the most. How could he have the audacity to take it upon himself to educate these girls? Granted, some of what he was saying was true (in regards to the importance of knowing what exactly is going to happen after the wedding) but the hallway on BYU campus, with none of us even approaching marriage, is not the appropriate time or place to gain this knowledge. He was way out of line. But what frustrates me the most is that I just sat there and stewed. I did nothing to curb the conversation. I should have stopped it, but I didn't, even though I could tell that some people (one girl in particular that I am trying, clumsily, to woo) were uncomfortable with the conversation. I went home that day and I felt guilty because I had let the conversation run on. I was the oldest there by a significant margin, and therefore I felt that it was my responsibility to protect the innocence of those freshman girls, but I didn't. For which I am sorry.

But this is an illustration of why I love Utah, Provo and BYU in particular, so much. So many people speak negatively of the so-called Utah "bubble," but it is really a great thing. It is so refreshing to be here among people with standards. To not hear cussing on a constant basis, to not constantly encounter base discussions on sex. For instance, when I was a freshman in high school on a long bus ride for a basketball trip, I overheard a conversation from two girls who were 14 and 15 years old in which they were discussing, quite casually, how they liked to have sex with their boyfriends. I never would have heard that in Provo.

Or at least, I shouldn't have heard that in Provo. It really disappoints me that I did. And the attitude of the young man disappoints me as well. He was proud of his knowledge. I for one, wish that I knew significantly less about sex. I'd much rather find this out sometime before my wedding night, through the appropriate channels, rather than all these random conversations that I encounter all the time. I don't hold it against the people that I know back home, but I lost a lot of respect for this young man at BYU. But, once again, I'm more disappointed in myself because I was the good man who did nothing.