Ramblings of a Wandering Man

This is really just a post to announce to the world that I still exist. This has been one of the longer dry spells as a blogger, and what I am offering with this post is nothing more than a tiny drop of relief (for me, not necessarily for you).

I am back in Alaska for the summer. After the whirlwind finish to my last semester of college (EVER!), my summer home is a refreshing dip into a slower paced, relaxed world. Unfortunately, a week in Glennallen, Alaska is enough to make me want to go back to the other one. This place is a dead end for me. I love it, and I hate to dog on it, but I can't live here, yet. As soon as the summer is over I'm taking my money and running.

But that brings up the question of where exactly I am going. My original intention was to return to Provo, UT. I like it there; I have both friends and family in the area. And there are lots of girls. But on the other hand, I'll be hanging around in a college town with no real possibilities for good employment. Plus, the one girl who really made Provo an intriguing option is now engaged to the boyfriend whom I hoped she would. . . disengage.

Ack! Curses!

But where else would I go? I can't stay in Alaska without turning into a depressed and crazy old hermit. I've considered Georgia, I spent a couple years there and liked it a lot. It would be nice to go back, but I can't think of any specific reasons to return other than nostalgia.

My list of other options totals a big fat zero.

Any suggestions?

(In theory, I can go anywhere if I achieve my dream of making my living as a writer).

I no longer have to spend money on school

Now that I am graduating from BYU (after 7 long years) I find myself in a strange situation. See, all my money for the last 10 years of my life has been going mostly to school (and a mission). Since I am still single and uncommitted that means I have all sorts of marvelous opportunities before me. Here are three of them:
















So yeah. That's a 2011 Ford Mustang (on the right). It has the new 5.0 Coyote engine which literally sends chills down my spine. Oh, and there's a house up there too. And a Honda Shadow Phantom.

Now, I never thought I'd be a motorcycle kind of guy, but lately I've found the idea very appealing. I can't really define why, though it may have something to do with being a free man (in other words: bachelor).

And of course I'll be able to afford all these things because I'm going to be so rich once I graduate. An English degree is pretty much guaranteed money, right?

Poem of the Month

Greater Love


Red lips are not so red
As the stained stones kissed by the English dead.
Kindness of wooed and wooer
Seems shame to their love pure.
O Love, your eyes lose lure
When I behold eyes blinded in my stead!

Your slender attitude
Trembles not exquisite like limbs knife-skewed,
Rolling and rolling there
Where God seems not to care:
Till the fierce love they bear
Cramps them in death’s extreme decrepitude.

Your voice sings not so soft,—
Though even as wind murmuring through raftered loft,—
Your dear voice is not dear,
Gentle, and evening clear,
As theirs whom none now hear,
Now earth has stopped their piteous mouths that coughed.

Heart, you were never hot
Nor large, nor full like hearts made great with shot;
And though your hand be pale,
Paler are all which trail
Your cross through flame and hail:
Weep, you may weep, for you may touch them not.


Wilfred Owen

School-Homed

http://www.theonion.com/articles/increasing-number-of-parents-opting-to-have-childr,17159/



This is funny because it is true.

I kind of miss having a fake tan. . .

I have survived, once again, one more Dancesport competition. Actually, that wasn't hard to do because I didn't dance anything. Well, that's a lie, technically I danced in a class competition; I mean, I was there in it. However, it wasn't something that I practiced for or anything. Anyway, since I am graduating, I chose not to compete in any serious manner for dance this semester. The result was actually quite interesting because this was the most low stress Dancesport that I've ever experienced. On the other hand, the atmosphere was still magical, and I kind of regret not dancing.

Instead, I did my service behind the scenes running the registration table in the tunnel of the Marriot Center.

The coolest thing that happened the whole weekend was when this REALLY SMOKIN' HOT Amateur Latin dancer from New York came up to my table. She was dressed in her costume, a slinky black dress with rhinestones and a kind of drapey/flowy thing. Anyway, she came up to me and told me she had forgotten to bring some fishnets. Now, why would she come ask me, a casually dressed male sitting at a table, about fishnets? I mean, she couldn't have even known that I was a dancer. So basically, she thought I was such a stud that she just had to find some way to talk to me.

I directed her to the OBVIOUS source of information, one of the two costume ladies that was patrolling the hallway. STUPID!!! Why didn't I get her number? Or something.

After that, she was my favorite dancer for the evening. Couple 636. I think her name is Evgenia, and she kind of had an accent, but not much. I DID kind of talk to her as she passed by later in the evening. And she warmed up right in front of my table. Yum. Did I mention that she was very attractive? Anyway, I got a couple pictures of her while I was snapping pictures of Amateur Latin, none of them are very good, but I'll post them anyway.

Ok, that wasn't really the highlight of my weekend. There were tons of other cool things that happened at Dancesport, but I've written about such things before.

Gender Bending

Maybe this is affecting more species than just froggies. . .

Weed Killer Radically Alters Frog Reproduction - US News and World Report

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Just a Few General Notes

My whole family is visiting Utah for almost the whole month of March. I'm pretty excited about this. It'll be nice to see them and I think we'll have lots of fun. Of course the reason that they are coming isn't very good. My sister decided to grow a big nasty thing in her stomach.


Of course, since I'm a bit of a geek this is the first mental image I had of her. . .growth.



Yes, every time I'm around her I'm half expecting a super cool scene from a sci-fi movie to take place. Unfortunately (?) her growth doesn't seem to be near this exciting, thus she actually has to have it removed manually--via doctors and stuff--which is why my family is coming down.

All joking aside this is actually a pretty serious tumor that she's growing. It's huge, and could possibly threaten her ability to have children. Obviously this whole situation has been pretty hard on her, but she's tough and will deal with it fine. She hasn't actually said very much about this to me because I've been spouting off and getting all whiny lately, for which I now feel very stupid.

Speaking of which, I have a new vendetta against returned missionaries. Well, not so much against them all, but against those who come home feeling like they're entitled to get a little action from the first girl they come across. You can make an educated guess as to why this is getting my goat. And I definitely don't like hearing returned missionaries brag about how quickly they made out with a girl after they returned home. Listening to those kinds of conversations makes me feel kind of like pulling out my red lightsaber and opening up a can of Darth Vader. Making out with a girl two or even three weeks after getting back just seems a little shallow to me. On the other hand, I may have a pretty skewed perspective on this. I'm a writer, a romantic if you want, and I still believe in the idea of true love. And here I am trying to find that one girl, the one who is my BEST friend, so that I can devote myself to her forever. . .but here I am also, 28 and still single. Which just makes me wonder if I've been doing this all wrong. I'm pretty frustrated about all this. Sure, I feel annoyed that I got beat out by some hoser who just got off his mission. But mostly I'm really just frustrated with myself.


The End.