Monday, April 27, 2009

The Moose and the Duck

Life has been rather hectic lately as I tried to orchestrate the end of my semester (finals, papers, etc. . .) with moving my years of accumulated junk into storage. As a result, I was looking forward to the calming effect of returning to my native land where I could be one with the elements. For the most part, I'm recuperating quite nicely. . .I went to work today, rode a snowmachine, got sun/snow burned, and lifted heavy items on ice and mud. It was good.

However, not all about returning home has been inspiring. There are some things about Glennallen, Alaska that I tend to forget a bit too easily against the grandeur of the raw wilderness that has so imprinted itself in my character. I was rudely awakened to this when I attended a "concert" that my brother was participating in.

First of all I should point out that my brother is a musical genius. All of my siblings and I have accomplished some degree of proficiency in music, but my brother puts us all to shame--if only he had the work ethic to equal his talent.

With that said, the "instructor" of music for this "concert" was the best musician Glennallen could offer. He's a man who is so convinced of his own genius, that he falls short of intelligence.

The concert was embarrassing.

To fully understand the scope of embarrassing I shall explain the song--composed by the instructor and performed by his After School Honor Choir--called, "The Moose and the Duck."

It goes like this:

Unnghhhhhhhh, Unnnnnghhhhhhhh
Quack Quack
Unnnghhhhhhhh, Unghhhhhhh, Unnnnnngggggghhhhhhhhh
Quack Quack, Quack, Quack
Uuuuuunnnnnnnnngghhhhhhhhhhhhhhgghhnnnnnghghghghghgh
QuackQuackQuackQuackQuackQuackQuack

And so forth, for several moments with the instructor waving his arms as if he is conducting the London Philharmonic Orchestra. And he's serious. This is something being performed for the community. . . it's not a warm up exercise.

And there's my brother--musical genius that he is--sitting in the back of the choir, tall, gangly, with long rebellious-musician hair, grunting like a moose in mating season.

I am so embarrassed, and so sad. And I kind of want to move back to Provo.

2 comments:

Analei said...

I heard about it. I remember going to a concert of his quite a few years ago. I think it was a Christmas concert and it was also extremely embarrassing and uncomfortable to attend. The worst part was that instead of showcasing the students, the music instructor showcased himself. And he has absolutely nothing to showcase. It was so painful!

Analei said...

P.S. If I remember correctly, he had the choir perform that same "song" and I was squirming in my seat it was so bad.